A Hairy Situation

On the Barbara Walters Oscar special, Monique told Babs that she absolutely refuses to shave her legs.

A few months back, I remember reading a story about Monique's post-Precious weight loss in People magazine. And I remember commenting to my friend Sha'Donna that I was really excited for Monique; she looked great but dang, did she forget to shave her legs?

Well, I guess the egg's on my face. What I thought of as a big slip-up on the magazine's part was intentional.

I think it's commendable that Monique refuses to bow to cultural norms. While it may seem totally nonchalant not to shave your legs because you're not taking any action; it's incredibly brave as a woman to step out in a ballgown with hairy legs. Just by the face Barbara made and the incredulous tone in her voice, you know it's one of those things that's just not done.

Society wants women to feel embarrassed when we walk outside with our legs covered in our own fur. That's our natural state; that's the way our bodies have evolved. Hair serves a purpose - it keeps our bodies warm in the winter (trust me, I live in Illinois). When did society come up with this arbitrary rule that it's unsightly, improper and downright unfeminine to publicly display our hairy legs?

I have to give the woman her props. Now Monique told Barbara the reason she doesn't shave her legs because she did it once and it hurt and it grew back thicker. Well, I recently read that our hair does not grow back thicker; we just think it does since it's more visible against our skin.

I'm not sure I buy her story. It takes a lot of careful consideration not to give in to the pressure to groom your legs. Especially when you're in the public eye. Remember the backlash Julia Roberts got for not shaving her underarms and going to a movie premiere? How dare she?! I'd prefer to think Monique is purposefully flouting arbitrary social norms to prove a point. Because as much as I agree with her, I really don't have the strength to let anyone see my winter growth.

He's Just Not That Intelligent

Riding in on the coattails of He's Just Not That Into You comes Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man from relationship expert ... Steve Harvey. Steve Harvey of the same-named TV show that's on reruns on TBS? Yes, that's the one.

I caught him promoting his new book on the Today Show as I was getting ready for work this morning. And not only was his segment insulting but, it made me wonder what the deal is with this recent trend of men needing to give women advice for being such failures at pleasing men. Where'd this niche grow from? And what makes Steve Harvey think he understands women? Why is it men are so great at reading women and women so terrible at interpreting men, at least according to all these relationship books?

I'll tell you what, all this guidance really just sounds like reinforcement of patriarchal gender norms. Men telling women how they ought to behave. Harvey went so far as to tell Meredith, host of the Today Show, that women belong at home. Act like a lady, that's how you keep a man, he said. Don't try to be all independent. Well some women enjoy being independent, having a job, making their own money, building a career, Meredith protested. Harvey went so far as to ask her if that's what women really want, wouldn't they rather have a man take care of them? Needless to say, she was annoyed. As was I. Correct me if I'm wrong but I thought we were living in '09, not 1949.

If some men are threatened by an independent woman, that's their drama. Maybe they need to work on their self-confidence. Read a couple self-help books.

-De