Decadence: A Decade's End

As 2010 crawls to a start, I can't help but reflect on not just the past year but, the last decade. I can't help but imagine that in history books, the 2000s will go down as a time of extreme materialism and for lack of better term ... decadence. In the words of Britney Spears, the official motto of this decade should have been "Gimme gimme more."

For me, the last 10 years have been completely transformative, as I started the Millennium as a pimple-faced adolescent. So for me, it's almost hard to imagine a time before the Internet. I honestly can't believe that I've only had a cell phone for the last 6 years because texting is now just the fastest way to communicate with someone. And my goodness, I don't even know what college students did before Facebook and YouTube. They probably got out more often. Or just were drunk more often. Either way, these advents have come to define my generation.

Here's a look back at what I mean about the Gimme More years.

The Web

The Internet has taken over our lives. But with every advance, it seems that we are always want things to be faster, stronger, more accessible. Pretty much every cafe, library and even public parks now offer wi-fi, a concept that was just not conceivable (at least to me) 10 years ago.

I didn't have access to the Internet until I was in high school and now, I don't know what I would do if I lost access to it. It's just so much easier to hide behind an e-mail than to put yourself out their face-to-face.


















I know some people might call Gen. Y the "Look at Me" generation because, let's face it, technology normalized our self-absorption. Blogs have pretty much replaced diaries and bonus! - we can now broadcast our feelings to the whole world. Depending on how self-obsessed we are, we can tell people what we're doing pretty much any time of the day. And as I said before, it's hard to believe YouTube has only been around for a half-decade. Viral videos are so prevalent in our culture now. It's hard to imagine the college experience without the joy of the Pearl/"Landlord" video or egads being totally and utterly disgusted by just the mention of "Two Girls and a Cup." And like YouTube, Facebook brought procrastination to a whole new level. Hours upon hours can be spent on Facebook, if you have the time and don't burn your lap with your laptop. You can invent a whole new cyber persona, friend people you haven't so much as spoken to in real life, and stalk crushes through this medium. If that's not enough, you can create party invitations, organize photo albums, and carry on entire conversations with friends without so much as talking to them. And you can lie in bed the whole time you're doing this.

And now, you can do all these things from your phone! It give me a headache just to think about it.

Movies

There have been quite a few trends in films this decade including the Manchild movies (ie: the Hangover, the 40-year-old Virgin, and anything starring Will Ferrell), tween flicks (anything starring anyone from the Disney Channel) and the re-emergence of the musical (Moulin Rouge, Rent, Nine). But the one constant has been epic special effects movies. The stories are simple: superhero stories (Spiderman, Batman, Ironman), the archetypal hero's journey (Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter) and most of these stories are adaptations from comic books and popular novels. The equation's always the same = simple plot, strong characters, and big, huge explosions. Movies were all about demonstrating technical mastery, not of the craft of acting but rather, the developments of computer-generated technology. Each and every action film seems to be trying to outdo the last.

And even simple cartoons got in on the action. One-dimensional cellularly constructed cartoons grew nearly invisible by the end of the decade. Pixar and Dreamworks owned children's movies and every year, computer animated films got more precise, more realistic looking.

Music

The 2000s was the decade of overproduced, overpackaged musicians. In my opinion, women reined supreme this decade. But most of these women were created by men. They were taught to sing (or at least lip sync) with over-the-top gesturing, dance like pros, flirt with men and women alike and just generally sell their brands. Britney and Christina were pumped out of the Disney machine. Beyonce and Jessica were cultivated by their fathers. Pink went from punk to pop-music mold. The top group of 2009 was the Black Eyed Peas, a "band" made up of mostly producers. And keeping with the mechanization of our society, synthesizers and auto-tune took the place of vocal talent.

Society

The idea of bigger is better ruled this decade. It's now wonder Hummers became an unofficial symbol of our culture. As a society, we became hyper-consumers, we wanted it all. Anything we could get our hands on.

After the longest period of peace in the United States, we entered into not just one but, two wars at the same time. Thanks to the 24-hour news cycle, 'civilian casualties' became a daily part of our lives. Thanks to all the money pumped into the military complex, the country entered into a historical level of debt.


And it wasn't just the government that couldn't control it's spending. As objects got shinier, our collective credit card bills grew out of control. Personal debt skyrocketed. Our eyes got bigger and bigger and we strove for items we knew were completely out of range, such as houses with mortgages that were completely unaffordable. It was only a matter of time until our spending caught up with us, which it did the last two years. And now, even our numbers of unemployment are outrageous.

I could go on and on. But I'm going to stop here. I want to hear from you, do you agree with me or am I totally off-base?

Either way, I hope the new decade provides something of a social cleanse.

Grammy Whammy

Grammy award nominations were announced yesterday. Beyonce reigned supreme with a total of 10 nominations. But, if were her, I would not be very excited about that announcement. Why? Perhaps that's because one of the ten categories she was nominated in - Best Rap/Sung Collaboration - also features "I'm On a Boat." Yes, that's the song made infamous in the SNL digital short by T-Pain and Andy Samberg's Lonely Island.

Don't get me wrong, I think the song is hilarious. I have jammed to it in the car with my friends and in the club. But, I also know the song was created in the name of comedy. Nominating "I'm On a Boat" for a non-comedy Grammy category somehow de-legitimizes the entire award show and Grammy academy. Following the suck that was the AMAs, I'm really starting to lose faith in the recording industry's weak attempts at grabbing ratings.

Coincidentally, Kanye West has three nominations in that same category (one for his collab with Beyonce on "My Ego"). If "I'm On a Boat" wins, you know Kanye's gonna have something to say about it.

Ignorance Heard 'Round the World

Bitch, please news in brief:

There have been so many things in the popular culture stratosphere that I have wanted to comment on but, with Internet connection issues and my (as yet undiagnosed) adult ADD issues, I just haven’t been able to link up to the old Blogger. Sorry about that. So many things to cover. These past few weeks have been crazy.

First of all, I have to address some of the drama my hometown of Rockford, Illinois has been dealing with for the past few weeks, maybe even a month. While I was at training for my new job, a fellow 23-year-old Rockfordian was shot to death at a church daycare center. Mark Anthony Barmore, who was said to be wanted on battery charges, was gunned down by local cops because he allegedly had a weapon in his possession and was resisting arrest. Tell me why this guy was shot mutliple times in the chest and in the back (I wish I knew the exact number, the reports on the local news site no longer contain this information). And wouldn’t you know it? He was found to not have any weapons on him. I don’t claim to know anything about being a cop but, isn’t it unethical to shoot some one who is fleeing? For a domestic disturbance, really? Those of you unfamiliar with Rockford, Illinois must know that it is an extremely divided city. Literally, you drive over the bridge from the east side to the west side and you see different street conditions, different neighborhoods and different colors. In the past few weeks, Reverend Jesse Jackson has been pushing for justice with the Barmore case. There have been talks with city officials, public cries of outrage, and even a march and a counter-march in support of the police. Healing Rockford seems to be Jackson’s new pet project, and really that’s OK with me. This is not the last we will hear of this case; I’ll keep you updated.

Jackson at Barmore's funeral September 3.

Next, Obama delivered his education speech to America’s future and a bunch of ignant people decided it would be harmful for their children to be addressed by the president. I actually heard people complaining about how they didn’t want their kids involved with politics, that it was dangerous for the president to talk directly to children because he might influence them. The speech might be to socialist blah blah blah. Really, is it so terrible for the leader of a nation to encourage future generations to stay in school and become upstanding citizens? Apparently so, which is why President Obama’s speech was actually banned by some school districts, including a few schools in Illinois. Sadly, President Obama is not the first to deliver such a message to the schoolchildren of America; both Ronald Reagan and George H.W. conducted teleconferences with school children during their presidencies.

Obama attempting to con children of America by telling them education is important.

All this talk about president brainwashing kids, and the idea that influencing kids to be responsible, to be communities leaders is bad, well that all just strikes me as veiled racism. For all this talk about “post-racial America,” I knew it was just a hollow phrase. Sure, we have a (half) black man in office. That doesn’t mean that prejudiced people won’t continue to express their prejudices.

Then, Obama spoke in front of Congress about his health care plan. And the Republican Party showed themselves to not just be disagreeable but, flat-out rude. Not every one behaved in such a fashion but, the actions of a few dragged the GOP down even further. Grand Old Party my ass. Somehow, by yelling “you lie” (really? Not even a ‘you lie, sir!’ He may as well have said, “Stop lying, you big liarface.”), Rep. Joe Wilson has turned into some kind of a martyr. I’m not really sure what his cause is. Those tea party people, the ones with all those signs proclaiming his awesomeness haven’t shown themselves to be for much of anything. Just against anything that threatens the status quo. "Liar, liar, pants on fire" might have been too harsh.

And I’m not appreciating those joker signs I’ve seen around town (as much as people made fun of G.W., his face was never pasted on a local telephone pole with some deragotary phrasing underneath). Those pictures of Obama as a witch doctor? Not cool. Quite frankly, when people feel the need to defend themselves so fiercly against being racist, there’s usually something to it, or else they wouldn’t care that much about what people think about them.

Just two example of the signs Tea Party protestors are marching around with. Racism is really not revolutionary, guys.

This has also been a week of people saying exactly what’s on their minds and getting in a shit-ton of trouble for it.

Former President Jimmy Carter had the balls to say what is on every tolerant person’s mind, that people are letting racism get in the way. It’s fine to dissent, to disagree with the president. But when your criticism takes the ugly turn and you start to use hateful, intolerant language, it begs the question, are you against the president’s policies or are you against the man himself?

Old people speak the truth.


And we all know by now what happened with Kanye. He just had to open his big mouth at the VMA’s. The thing about Kanye West is, he says whatever’s on his mind. And a lot of the time, he’s right. At least, he says what everybody’s thinking but won’t say out loud. Because it’s not polite. That can be a great thing if he’s say, standing up for a cause or bringing ignored social issue to the public’s attention (like the now infamous Katrina comment) but, when it comes to say, disagreeing with an award show recipient’s selection and stealing that recipient’s award speech, it’s uncalled for. Basically, it was a dick move. Believe me, I agreed with what he said (I had just shouted in outrage at my friend’s TV set that there was no way Taylor Swift had a better video than Beyonce) but, that does make it right. The most telling thing about the whole incident is that Beyonce’s video was the best of the year but where it received its most heavy rotation is Youtube. It is a freakin Youtube sensation. MTV barely plays videos anymore, so who actually cares what the outcome of the VMAs is? Beyonce sure as hell didn’t seem to care; she has Grammys. It was unexpected and funny when it happened but that was a week ago people, I’m over it. Talk shows, I know this is an easy joke but, come up with some fresh material.

And Serena Williams tried to make some cute joke on the VMA broadcast to get some better press after her big blow up Saturday night. For those of you who didn’t see it, I have to admit it was a surreal experience to watch. Tennis is all stiff-upperlipy and here was this girl who spent part of her childhood in Compton refusing to take a shitty call from a lineswoman. What she yelled at the lineswoman was inappropriate for sure. As with Kanye, it was just uncalled for. But, it got blown way out of proportion. Now the lineswoman was certainly well within her rights to report Serena but I have to wonder, in those high-stakes sporting arenas, aren’t the judges supposed to have thicker skins? Hadn’t she ever been threatened before. As I said, Serena crossed a line with her threat but, the lady didn’t need to be running scared like she was actually going to get a ball stuffed down her throat. Two days later, Roger Federer was cited for using inappropriate language at his match (sure he just swore, didn’t make any threats) and nobody said boo about it. It’s actually more shocking to me that the always nonchalant “reserved,” as the commentators call him, Federer swore than to hear Serena go off. We all know she’s aggressive and ridiculously competitive. I see her outburst as an extension of these two behaviors.

And I’m not trying to condone any of the inappropriate behavior exhibited by these celebrities; I just find it interesting that what they said received so much backlash. And yet, here we have all these narrow-minded people making all sorts of overt racial comments (which I feel are the most harmful to our society) that just fly under the radar.

Beyonce's new single: I'm a I'm a aaaa-nnoying!

Beyonce wearing an ancient Japanese torture device on the set of the "Diva" music video

I don't enjoy bashing music. I really do love music, truly madly deeply. However, I think Beyonce is one of the most annoying performers of our generation (i.e. Single Ladies, the pink panther song: Check on it).

The girls got pipes and looks and moves BUT she always settles for catchy, highpitched anthems and dances in unflattering unitards.

After her marriage to Jay Hizzle, I really thought she was a changed woman. I was diggin' "If I Were a Boy." It was a refreshing, raw, beautiful, simple...something that I haven't heard from Beyonce yet.

Then "Diva" comes along and changes errthing. Lyrics below

(sung by dwarves)
I'm a I'm a a diva hey
I'm a I'm a a diva hey

diva is a female version of a hustlah
of a of a hustlah
diva is a female version of a hustlah
of a of a hustlah

So profound, Beyonce. Her style has digressed about a decade with this song back to the Destiny's Child days.

A few quibbles, if I may:

A. Beyonce is not a hustlah, is just ridiculously wealthy. She has a pretty clean record tooo...no mugshots, arrests. Pretty wholesome actually.

B. Diva is NOT a female version of a hustla, of a, of a hustla. Diva is more like drama queen while hustlers are pretty much crackheads (thanks, Melvin!). Girls can be hustlas and guys can be divas, too. Mrs. Jay Hizzle, please do not equate the two and miseducate an entire generation into thinking that these words are alike

C. Bring back that classy lady that sung at the Inauguration. Bitch, Puh-lease?

Beyonce being classy and fierce at the Inauguration.

-Cris-izzle

Oscars recap, part deux

I know there're probably a million things out there written about the Oscars. But I can't resist; I have to add my two bits.

Unlike Cris, I'm a devout award show watcher. I especially love the Oscars because well, I love movies, inane celebrity banter, and the Red Carpet fashion show.

So here are my notes from the show.

Host Hugh Jackman: Because I have the mentality of a middle schooler, his name makes giggle. In fact, the name Hugh in general just sounds strange to me. My mother put on the Barbwa Walters special before hand, and I have to say, I was traumatized by the lap dance he gave her.

Penelope: I just saw Vicky Christina and was underwhelmed. But I was pleased that with my elementary understanding of Spanish, I could translate her speech to my family.

Dustin Lance Black: Awesome name first off. The winner of the screenwriting award gave the best speech of the night. Lovvved his personal anecdote and his advice to gay and lesbian teens. The fact that he was so young was hopeful as well.

Ben Stiller as Joaquin Phoenix (whoa that is a hard name to spell): Hilarious. I wish the whole event was on that level.

The musical number: was wack. I love a good song and dance but, this was certainly not one. Beyonce usually looks hot but, last night, something was off. I think it was the garish red leotard. The dancing coulda been better. Singing coulda been better. There coulda been better performers. And what's with the hack editing job? As soon as I recognized the song that was playing, it would change.

Presentations by former winners: Not sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, we got those heartfelt odes to all the nominees. On the hand, not all of the mini-speeches were so heartfelt. We also got to witness most of the actresses turn to mush during their tributes. But I like watching clips. And some of the people they choose - Cuba Gooding Jr. (one almost forgets he has an Oscar after watching Snow Dogs or Boat Trip) - were questionable.

Heidi Klum and Seal: Why were they there? More importantly, why we're their seats in the front when the techies and the short film people were relegated to the nosebleeds, making for a long and awkward march to the podium.

Domo Arigato, Mr. Roboto: At first I was confused. Did the animation short winner just end on an 80s song quote? But now I realize, that phrase truly is all the Japanese we Americans understand.

James Franco: is hot. And so was the Pineapple Express spoof. I especially enjoyed the trippyness of his character watching his Milk character make out with Sean Penn.

Heath Ledger win: Who didn't see this one coming? It was definitely emotional but I had to wonder if those were real tears welling up in Brad and Angie's eyes.

Slumdog: Sunday night was all about the brown invasion. I kept wondering if (in the spirit of the Brangelina cut over during Aniston's speech) the camera would cut over to previous Indian-descent Oscar winner Ben Kingsley. But no such shameless ploys. It was especially gratifying to see the little film that could take the biggest prize of the year. My belief is that the movie banked on the message of hope, which being America's slogan of the year, clinched the win.

Overall, the show was extremely predictable. I'm happy everyone who I thought deserved an award walked away with a statuette but at the same time, I love a good upset. The fashions were OK. A lot of the origami-style dresses went down the Red Carpet. But that's for another discussion.

One thing's for sure, there was a total Asian domination. Which is cool. Last year was all about the Euros with actors from European nations taking all the big awards. Who knows, maybe next year there'll be an African takeover! One can dream.